Siblings
Throughout time, people have noticed that it is a common occurrence to witness siblings fight or argue about almost anything. One of the biggest reasons for these disagreements is the age gap. Especially, at a young age, differences in age make a huge difference in kids. An older brother for example, who is 9 years old will have a much different perspective on issues than his 14 year old, older sibling. Whereas a 70 year old younger sibling will have the same views as his 75 year old older sibling. Therefore, at a young age, it is important for parents to navigate through the age gap, and create a healthy environment for their children. As a 17 year old, older brother myself, I have had struggles bonding with my 9 year old younger sister. We constantly have arguments over minor things, which may offset mine or her mood. However, my parents have implemented strategies to develop an emotionally safe environment for me and my sister, and helped us bond and create deeper connections with one another. Our parents consistently encouraged us to participate in shared activities, which would captivate both mine and her interests. This helped us have a good time together, and understand that happy times come with each other's presence. As a child's mind is still developing they are susceptible to reinforcement strategies. Therefore, if you provide rewards for your children when they treat each other with respect, they will understand that constantly doing so will constantly get them rewarded, meaning it is the right thing to do. According to B.F Skinner, a famous psychologist who is a graduate of Harvard University, reinforcement is the best way to allow someone to learn patterns, and differentiate the right from the wrong. Generally, it is important to enforce respect and good communication between siblings, as these are very important traits to have. Siblings are supposed to be the people who are there for each other for their whole lives. Personally, my parents always preached to me, that when they pass away, and when no one else will ever be there for me, my sister will be. This has stuck with me throughout a majority of my life. Therefore it is vital to build close relations between siblings even when they have large age gaps. Kids will always have good intentions, but show them in the wrong ways. Therefore teaching them through forms of discipline will put them on the right track. As a parent, it is also important to understand that while teaching kids the right way to treat their siblings, you are not just teaching them to be respectful in the moment, but rather throughout their futures. You have to explain to your kids that they will not always get what they want, and they have to learn to respect others' wishes, and in many instances be able to compromise. Now what does it really mean to compromise? Compromising means to settle a dispute by mutual concession. This means that two sides submit to mutual terms, meeting parts of the wants and needs of both sides. Compromising is a skill that will last a lifetime for your children, and is an essential skill to learn from a young age. This helps communication throughout school, family, friends, and eventually work. However, although compromise typically works with siblings, it is still important for siblings to understand their age roles, and how their age plays into how they should act with one another. For example, it is vital that an older sibling knows that they must set a good example for the younger one, and not get too angry with the younger one as mentally they are less developed than you are and less mature. However, you must also teach the younger child to respect the age difference, and to listen to the older siblings advice. You have to teach the younger sibling that, although from their perspective it may not seem this way, the older sibling only means well for their younger one. As an older brother, although I mean the best for my younger sister, when I try to explain something to her, teach her a lesson, or do something as little as help her with her homework, she argues with me over the smallest things. This makes my job as an older brother very difficult, and makes it hard for me to set a good example. Therefore parents all around the world need to portray their older sibling as someone who is trying to help rather than hurt their younger sibling. Eventually, all siblings realize, no matter the age gap, that they are a team rather than oppositions. They will understand that they are not each other's enemies, and will end up acting with respect towards each other. However, this development happens way later in life then it should. Therefore it is the job of the parents to practice reinforcement and teach their children that they are each other's best friends, and that with simple communication they can settle their differences. Overall, parenting is a very hard task and requires large amounts of time, money, and dedication. However, that feeling when you come home from work, and you see your two children peacefully playing with each other and engaging in an activity together, all of that hard work will seem worth it. You only get to raise each one of your children once, and your children only get one chance to grow up. Maximize their childhood experience, and make sure your children are on good terms with each other from a young age, as they are each other's closest people that they will ever have, and realizing this at a young age will greatly benefit them throughout their lives.
By: Max Reyzin 17 years old